Wednesday, March 5, 2008

My quarter life calm

I remember wondering as a child what life would be like when I finally became an "adult." I envisioned myself "doing lunch" with important people, making important business plans, and just being important. That what adults do - I thought. Looking back on these naive imaginations, don't think I would have thought about being an adult much if I really knew what life would be.
At 25 and about 3 weeks now, I am pretty sure I qualify as an adult - after all I can check off a new age range in demographic survey boxes. I can also now rent a car. To be honest though, a part of me feels like I have not grown up by my own choosing. This adult self has times when it longs to hear the bell for recess, or even looks around for crayons and a coloring book. As I look at these present imaginations, I realize that part of me wants to experience life as a kid again.
Is that the crisis of the quarter-life? Is it feeling like you've been forced to be a grown-up by making grown-up decisions, like going to work and paying bills? Or is it realizing you are an adult, but aren't as important as you imagined? Or could it be understanding that life is not as simple as you remembered it?
Today though, more than any other day that I can remember, I came to a juncture in which I knew I needed to make some decisions in my heart. Though some of the feelings I am experiencing may be characterized as somewhat of a "crisis," one of these many heart decisions is that I will NOT allow this time in my life a crisis. It is going to be my calm. The future me will look back at this time and say - "I am where I am today because of those great moments in my quarter-life calm."

6 comments:

Ana said...

hey frenika....thanks for sharing your thoughts. much of what you stated resonated with me. it is good to know that we are not on this journey alone, but rather, we continue to walk this journey together and grow into who God has called us to be individually, and collectively.
look forward to reading your thoughts!

Cardinals said...

Great reading info Frenika...this is completely awesome. Keep following purpose and destiny, don't let anything distract you. I look forward to more blogs and upcoming books in your future. Congratulations!!!

dee said...

I highly agree with your thoughts. It seems when are children we can't wait to be adults, but now that we are here we wish we could go back. I just recently wrote another poem-I will email to you in a sec.

Brenda said...

I agree with you. I mean I'm not yet at the age that I can rent a car, but I am in that pseudo adult phase also. Thanks for sharing this will all of us, God will use this to touch many hearts. I can't wait to read more!

Lala Tamago said...

I agree! Being a grownup is not as fun as it may seem but hey at least we can earn money so that we can buy more crayons, toys, and go on more adventures.

"Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance."

Djeanae said...

I am not afriad of Tomorrow, For I have seen Yesterday, and I Love Today!